My Velleity
by Luna's Palimpsest
Summary: All these years I have yearned for someone who could save me from this agony; someone who could see the real me; someone who could hear it…my unheard wish…my velleity. C.C./Lelouch


**A/N: **These past few years, I've been kinda busy that I did not have time to visit . And recently, as I visited here and went over some of fics, I went "oh-dot-oh...what the hell happened?". Well I guess changed its format so my fics kinda got messy. haha. Anyways, I pretty much fixed this one up (coz my gosh, there were grammatical errors...gomen.). I also will be reviewing my past fics for improvement. hehe. And if by any chance I would feel like it, I'll be finishing my 'oh-so-long-on-hiatus-fic'. haha.

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**Title:** My Velleity

**Anime:** Code Geass

**Pairing:** C.C./Lelouch Lamperouge

**Rate:** K+ (ages 9 and above)

**Genre:** Hurt/Comfort/Romance

**Summary**: All these years I have yearned for someone who could save me from this agony; someone who could see the real me; someone who could hear it…my unheard wish…my velleity.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Code Geass.

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**My Velleity**

_…_

"_Love is the emblem of eternity; it confounds all notion of time; effaces all memory of a beginning, all fear of an end."_

_- Germaine De Stael_

_…_

_

* * *

_

_Humans are feeble creatures…very weak and brittle creatures. They are the basic manifestations of imperfection. Easily, they are manipulated by their own foolish desires and thirst for luxury._

_Dreams…_

_Goals…_

_They set such things in order to have a meaning to their existence. They usually yearn for these to be inevitably on their grasp…Sad to say, such hopes are futile when Fate dictates the opposite of what they want._

_Money…_

_Power…_

_These are the primary causes of human decadence. These corrosive matters can even cause the kindest hearts and the most pristine souls to be tainted and eventually drowned into the dark depths of evil and wickedness. Humans unconsciously lead themselves to the perimeters of these sinful man-made needs, averting their path from where the tiny light of hope exists to the dark and cold tunnel…leading themselves to a never-ending search and struggle for something that even they could not remember what._

_Corruption…_

_The corruption of heart ignites the annihilation to human harmony. This sparked wars that destroyed thousands of homes, millions of lives, and billions of innocence._

_And the denouement,_

_Death._

_Every cycle has its end. And for the cycle called life, the end is called death._

_Humans' greatest fear is death. Death cuts the thread that connects a human from the turbulent cycle of existence. To die means to cease to exist. Humans cannot bring all their riches and wealth in their death…and even these things cannot save them from their fated end._

_

* * *

_

Things have changed. Innovations became more diverse and humans have discovered ways to improve their living. Time had indeed passed together with these achievements for the human race.

Midst the busy civilization and together with the passing of centuries, I have been standing before life—watching impassively as history repeats itself. I have been living for a long time and have been subjected to many kinds of human cruelty.

I am what people call a witch. Being a witch, I have been wandering to far-off places and have been living all by myself.

I have been lonely all of these years…

…until I met him.

* * *

Strands of green were sprawled among the dancing verdant summer grasses. Emotionless golden eyes shined with the bright rays of light. Warm summer breeze caressed her pale, fair face. Her white and black country dress purled lightly with the gentle wind.

"I shouldn't have allowed this to happen in the first place…" she whispered and gradually closed her eyes.

_Immortality is a curse._

I'm certain that I have given him the necessary warnings.

_It is a never-ending punishment…_

I tried to push him away from this kind of living…

I never wanted him to suffer the same agony I have endured through these years…

"_You're…you're alive?"_

"_Yes. But…I'm sure Suzaku had stabbed me."_

I have had a premonition that day. The day you stood before Charles. I swore there was something in my heart that screamed for a warning…a warning that something unanticipated was going to happen.

* * *

A voice called out from a cabin nearby. "C.C.! Your pizza's ready!"

The green haired witch wearily lifted her heavy eye lids and noticed that she had been sleeping on the grassy ground for hours. The orange firmament indicated that it was indeed late in the afternoon. She anchored her arm on the ground and raised herself. The gray witch rubbed her sleepy eyes with the base of her palm and yawned ungraciously.

"_I have been absorbed by my thoughts."_ She mused and caught the smell of pepperoni and cheese. Her stomach instantly reacted with a growl. She dumbly scratched her head and got to her feet.

"I'm hungry…" she muttered to herself and entered the cabin.

* * *

I have already met almost kinds of people. Ranging from the purest to the vilest, I have encountered each of them. Some have left an impression in my reminiscence while others were left waning in the passing of time.

I have treasured and trusted many people. I have shared smiles and tears with them. These people have made me feel important. And I really am grateful to have them. But as time goes by, they aged while I remained young. They eventually died and left me alone. At first, it was painful. It was really excruciating to see an important person dying in front of you.

All that I have treasured…all that was important to me have passed away. It was very difficult to accept the fact that they all have left me…

…but I am immortal.

I do not die.

I'm like an eternal figure thriving on a turbulent zone of beings that are blessed to have a mortal life.

It is always like that…

That is why I abandoned my feelings—the only thing that can prove my existence as a human being. This is the only way I can bear this curse. Emotions are manifestations of a living creature…a mortal living creature. If I would not trust people, then I would not treasure them. If I do not treasure them, then I can accept the fact that they would eventually die. That way, I would not feel alone and deserted anymore.

I have been criticized, accused countless times as a heretic. I have been burned at stake, stabbed by swords, exploded by bombs, shredded into pieces…and yet I lived. I will never die even if they burn the last piece of me. I will continue to thrive and carry this eternal punishment forever…

* * *

C.C. immediately sat on the dining chair and extended her arm to pull a slice of pizza. She brought it to her mouth and took a bite.

"Have you been sleeping outside?" a young man's voice inquired her.

The gray witch lazily lifted her golden orbs to the violet ones of the lad before her. "Hai…" she muttered and took another bite from her pizza.

The dark haired teen sighed wearily and leaned on his left palm which was resting on the dining table.

The gray witch gradually put down her half-eaten pizza and lifted her face to look at the young man before her.

"Lelouch…" she called out softly.

The prince jerked his gaze up to meet the witch's firm eyes. He couldn't help but to feel something inside him ache. The cause was uncertain but something beyond her secure countenance was making him feel this way.

"…you tired?"

"Huh?" Lelouch asked uncertainly.

C.C. heaved a sigh and leaned back. "You know…" she grabbed the half-eaten pizza on the plate and brought it to her mouth. "…you should not repress your feelings. It's bad for your health." She finished her statement and took a bite from the pepperoni pizza.

Lelouch's lips curled up to a cynical curve. "Look who's talking…" he scoffed.

C.C. finished her slice of pizza before throwing a composed look at the Black Prince. "Nani?" she asked deviously.

The dark haired prince turned into a serious façade. "We've been accomplices for decades now C.C.. Don't expect me to be deceived by your pretense."

"…"

Lelouch was startled when tears began to flow from the witch's golden eyes.

Her secure countenance had failed.

It has been decades since he last saw her like this. She looked so fragile…like a lost, helpless little girl. He had been used to seeing her in an independent and indifferent facade…but at the moment, the C.C. in front of him was so weak…so full of sad emotions. Something inside him ached to see her like this.

"I…" she started while tears fell endlessly from her eyes. It was like she finally had shed those suppressed tears that had been formed due to loneliness in the past centuries of her life. "…I just wanted you to be happy…I can't…I can't bear to see you like this anymore!"

Lelouch stood up and leaned on the table to capture her head on his warm arms. He pulled her tightly to his chest.

The witch felt another wave of tears threatening to fall from her teary eyes. She instantly held to his accomplice's slender physique.

And so she wept.

"It's okay…you can cry on me." He whispered softly and closed his eyes.

C.C. couldn't reply words but just cries. She felt like all her suppressed emotions were finally being set free at the moment. Her whole body was shook with her cries as she helplessly clung to Lelouch as if he was her life source.

"I'm sorry…" the warlock whispered and stroked his hand on the witch's green locks in a soothing manner. "You need not to suppress your feelings. I'll always be here to listen to you. We're accomplices after all, right?"

* * *

Life was boring…well at least, eternal life. I have to go on with the same routine everyday: traveling all by myself, eating with nobody, and talking to no one but my deceased friend—Marianne.

Marianne vi Britannia. She was one of those few people who have left an impression on my reminiscence. Aside from being a contractor, she had been a good friend. At first, I have conspired with her and Charles for their view of peaceful world though I gradually felt that it wasn't really right. There was something wrong in their interpretation of peaceful.

Aside from Marianne, I've met other members of the Royal family of Britannia. There I met Charles and V.V.. Charles was the same as Marianne. They were both corrupted by their desires. V.V., on the other hand, was just like me though I'm absolutely older than him. We share the same curse.

Marianne has two children: Lelouch vi Britannia and Nunnally vi Britannia. I met Lelouch when he was young. He was a different child, I should know. Not like his half-brothers, he seemed to have his own-will. He definitely was special.

I met him again after 7 years. I was captured by Britannia because my powers got their interest. He had been a normal Britannian citizen by that time and tried to save me bare-handed. I granted him the power of the Kings to help him attain his desire for revenge and peace for her beloved sister.

And that started our pact.

* * *

The sky was majestic. Stars were scattered on the pitch-black firmament. The moon was full, emitting wonderful glow on the creatures beneath it.

Golden eyes glinted with the ethereal rays of moonlight. Mild, cold night breeze carried green, silky locks. The green haired witch sat calmly at the porch of their cabin. Her lips were curved into a light smile. Chill wind blew through her shoulders that were exposed due to the style of her country dress. She couldn't help but to shiver as the cold wind passed upon her.

She was startled when she felt something being dropped on her bare shoulders.

"You should wear a jacket if you're planning to hang here. It is cold you know…"

C.C. turned her head to see her accomplice casually dropping a jacket on her shoulders. He gave her a warm smile before taking a seat beside her. She responded with a slight smile and returned on her moon-gazing.

They were silent for a while, cherishing the serene environment.

It was C.C. who decided to break the silence.

"Lelouch…"

The Black Prince turned his head to the Gray Witch. "Hmm?"

C.C.'s cold, pale hand fell atop Lelouch's warm ones.

"Promise me that you'll never leave me…"

Her soft golden eyes met his earnest violet ones.

"Promise me…you'll always be here with me…"

His warm hand enclosed her cold ones. She could feel his warmth overpowering the coldness that she felt. He was like an intense fire melting the barrier of nonchalance and indifference that she had built over these past centuries in order to protect herself from being hurt again. She was afraid at first; but before she knew it, he had already melted the barrier and had enclosed her to his warmth.

He was her greatest weakness…her only sanctuary.

The Prince lifted their linked hands and leaned in to place a chaste kiss on the witch's pale hand. This earned a blush from the green haired maiden.

He couldn't help but to grin at his accomplice's reaction.

"Forever…I promise."

* * *

Birth. Life. Death. That is the simple cycle of existence.

But it is different for an immortal like me. Death is omitted from the cycle. I will continue to live…for eternity.

It is true that immortality is a curse…

It is true that it is very lonely…

But I sure missed the only thing that could make my eternal life blissful…the only thing that life gives wonderful meaning to…the thing that could turn a curse to a blessing…

…and only my warlock had been able to hear and successfully grant it…

My unheard wish…my velleity…

…to be loved.

*****Owari*****


End file.
